Where indeed, did I sign up to be an anachronism? I've been asking that question for nearly fifty years.
But I know the answer-it was five thousand years ago, honest.
Sir Edmund Burke called me a blue stocking-I still haven't figured out if he meant it as a slur or a compliment. I've been smarting about that one for nearly two hundred years.
People ask me how I can in good conscience call myself a Christian as I believe in reincarnation, and utterly refute the idea that Jesus wanted the 'mystery of the mass' to include the completely pagan notion involved in the transmutation of the bread and wine into his body and blood.
And I do not believe Jesus bar Joseph ben David was, is, or ever will be, God in the flesh.
I came to those conclusions nearly two thousand years ago, BTW. Sects of the Jews believed in reincarnation, seeing it as the penultimate (a word that means second, by the way, not first. Grrr I hate when the word is misused!) expression of God's love and mercy for our kind. Jesus affirmed his belief when he told his followers that John the Baptiser was the returned Elijah.
Most importantly, though, Jesus himself refuted pagan beliefs of 'sin-eating' and flesh eating to gain the spiritual strengths of the consumed.
He also said that he was not God, only God is God, and there is no other God. (The Jews call this the Schema-forgive me if I have spelt it incorrectly.)
Of course, he also said "I come not to abolish the law but to uphold it!"
Which is why I have a REAL problem with Saul of Tarsus (AKA St. Paul of the Miraculous Conversion on the Road to Damascus). Saul contradicts the Christ repeatedly in his writing, and the blowhard's claptrap has been swallowed whole by two kinds-false shepherds and the ejit sheep being led to slaughter.
But because I am the sum of all my parts, I usually try to explain it, or at least I used to; I think today will be the last time I try.
I think that because I am an anachronism-a thing out of time and place.
For the first time ever, I feel the weight of all of the years I have been around, and I am so close to despair for the majourity of humankind that I really am tempted to give up and find a nice mountaintop to hide on until the dust settles.
Because no-one listens. And for the first time, I find myself beyond my usual amazement; I am moved to outrage.
And that is not a good thing.
I'm sitting here watching yet another civilization collapse, and I'm watching the collapse manipulated/escalated by the worst of the worst, who of course know the world will not really end, just civilization, and they can't wait to get their avarice swollen hands on the remains and the survivors, because they are sure that as in the past, they will be able to take brutal advantage of the aftermath of the collapse.
I was a business admin majour two years ago-hey, a girl nowadays has to pay her own rent, what? I was 4.0 to 3.9 and I say that then I hit the math wall, but the truth is that I got a look at the state of my student loans and simutaneously realized my degree would ensure my continued exposure to the (for me) dreaded Corporate Culture.
But before I came to my senses completely and dropped the hell out, I started my thesis intending to explore why and how the abuse of credit has led to the dis-enfranchisement of the middle class.
What I found was a global drive on the part of Corporate Culture to use the disenfranchisement to bring back feudalism.
Hey, will you at least consider this: if I saw it once before, I surely can recognize it now, right?
Well, I DID see it before, not once but several times!
For YOUR sakes, will you please look it up?
Every time a civilization falls, there comes the vultures. Well kiddies, the damned vultures are gathering, just as the Christ and all the prophets and messengers have been telling you for millennia-why in the name of all that once was holy do you think the war on faith-ANY faith in God-is so seriously escalated now?
Because if your faith, (which teaches you right from wrong and tells you that you are better than an instinct driven evolvement of a one celled amoeba, and shows you how to transcend savagery) which strengthens you, is stripped away, what's left besides vulnerability to a brutal enslavement and then an empty death?!
Can you say despair? Who profits from despair?
After I dropped out, I continued my research until finally, a few months ago, I just let it all go, thinking, what's the damn point?
It's my bloggy and I'll vent how I want to!