LIFE IN THE TIME OF CORONAVIRUS PART 12
4 July 2020 0842hrs BST (British Summer Time)

This morning at one minute past midnight, hair services parlours in England re-opened. Apparently the rush was huge - people wanted their CoronaCuts remedied. I admit the minute Scotland gave permission for hair services to resume bookings I joined the virtual queue - my appointment is for mid-September. I can only hope my hair doesn't continue to drive me so mad the scissors beckon, whispering insidiously 'Come on, admit it, nothing could possibly be as bad as your last home-haircut effort. Give it a go, it's only hair...'

Nearly three hours ago bars and pubs across England were also permitted to re-open doors. I checked the newsfeeds before starting to write this new blog entry but haven't been able to find a word about queues of punters outside pubs from 0'Dark-Thirty in hope of being first in to order a pint. Plenty of snaps of people having their hair done but no snaps of wannbe drinkers.

Now, I love a good pub lunch but I'm not much of a drinker so I'm in no rush to get down the pub. Actually, in fact, thanks to Paul's Asperger's, I'm not a drinker at all - best not to try having a cheeky bottle of Merlot in the cupboard when I know my husband's condition means he'd have 'just a thimble full' which would lead to a jag lasting months. Right now his jag is Sprite, last month it was Diet Coke (eeeeewwww!). He also goes on food-jags so I have to be careful about what comes in the door via the supermarket shop. One bite of something with gluten and he's off his coeliac diet for weeks until the cumulative pain finally forces him to stop sneaking gluten.

Speaking of supermarket shopping, I've mentioned before we try to do a 'Big Shop' once a month (SUCH a £££saver!). When we realised the UK would likely be going into 'lockdown' mass quarantine back in late January we began doing something of a much bigger 'Big Shop' and by the time 'lockdown' was ordered we had plenty of toilet tissue, for example.

Owing to my multiple heart conditions we took the decision I would keep to the house and garden, and Paul would do the quick nips to the local supermarket we use as a sort of greengrocer (their produce tables are very, very good!) and the monthly pick-up at the butcher and the big supermarket 6 miles southeast of us. Owing to the police cheerily pulling motorists over if there were two people in the motor, I haven't left the mews since mid-February - Paul has done the drive down to pick-up our Click and Collect (C&C) online ASDA Grocery orders.

Thanks to the relaxation of lockdown restrictions we Scots can now ride in cars together as long as we're of the same household. Next week I will FINALLY leave our wee neighbourhood to venture out as a passenger to the C&C pick-up. Not sure what to expect of the scenery - Paul would come home from the C&C trips and tell me the town was like a ghost town, no cars, no pedestrians, no kids on bicycles, nothing, not even a roaming cat. But things are slowly beginning to re-open even here in Scotland where the 'First Minister' (FM) is still on a major power binge and openly ridiculing the Prime Minister for his 'shambolic' relaxing of the lockdown she's sure is keeping the virus at bay. Except along the entire border with Wales and England - those towns are still on lockdown as she claims the 'R' there is on the uptick. Face masks are now mandatory on public transport and in shops here in Scotland. Doubtless Sturgeon will soon order face masks anytime we're off our personal properties - the dozy mare does like to try one-upping the PM. She is an embarrassment to Scotland and the UK and so is the FM of Wales, btw. 

The Scottish power-mad little git is threatening people with legislation. Fly into England from one of the very many virus safe countries and get straight onto tourist attractions. Fly into Scotland and you'd best be minted - Lil'Nic's minions will slap you straight into quarantine a full fourteen days long, a quarantine the traveller must foot the bill for. She's also threatening to erect border guard shacks between England and Scotland to force incoming English (and any Scot 'foolish enough' in her words to have been Down South) into quarantine.

All in, though, my take is the lockdown all over the UK did keep the infection rates down, gave time to the NHS and public health bodies to come up with successful treatments for the virus, and kept the health care system from collapsing. There have been 'covidiot' fuelled outbreaks but for the most part Britons have stuck to the plan. We may have moaned (and oh my did we!) but we stuck with it with remarkable good humour when all is said and done. Jigsaw puzzle and craft supplies sales have been healthy enough to keep several businesses afloat, as has a surprising resurgence of good old fashioned British spirit of enterprise - can't sell the fish/flowers/veg/beer and other microbrewery products wholesale owing to shuttered 'non-essential' business buyers? Quick, open an online shop with delivery free to locals and voila, back in business.

Families and friends learned to Zoom/Skype 'virtual' Sunday roasts and birthday parties; online raves gave nascent DJs an audience they might never have had. Local authorities (councils, other government bodies) realised while Zoom could be hacked, with proper IT it was a champion way to cut costs of travel to 'real' meetings. Chelsea Flower Show went online as did numerous other annual shows (from quilts to tech, it was all online - not perfect but surprisingly satisfying).

Sure, we missed EastEnders - but the Drama Channel continues showing two full 'classic episodes' per weekday, and the BBC is giving us (and will until the new episodes are ready) a Monday night 'Secrets of' and a Tuesday night 'best of' episode. 

And WOW was the ITV broadcasting lockdown-filmed programming SUPERB! From 'Isolation Stories' (Robert Glenister and his son Tom were outstanding, BAFTA deserving, as was Sheridan Smith as an expectant mother on her own during lockdown) to Alan Titchmarsh and his team doing a lockdown 'growing your own' series, ITV kept us entertained. The BBC managed to pull one genuine winner out of its hat with Michael Sheen and David Tennant (their partners and some surprising 'guest stars - Dame Judi Dench for one) as themselves trying to do lockdown rehearsals via ZOOM was so good I'm keeping the 'box set' I recorded on the PVR to watch again.

We adapted. Actually we adapted quite well despite the moaning. Now if people will stick to wearing face masks, keeping to a strict personal hygiene routine, and ffs - keeping yer distance, we should manage to make it through any 'second wave' without collapsing the NHS.

Paul and I are hermits by nature so the only 'hardship' we had to endure was not being able to take a drive down to the seaside to picnic from the front seat of the car tucked into a car park bay overlooking the shore.

I dimly recall being a bit more social (but not by much. I took work in a bar for a brief time 40 years ago so I could get out nights without the hassle of actually being part of the crowd. I don't miss it) so I have some empathy for party animals who've been forced to be indoors alone. I have a huge compassion for the people whose furloughs have now morphed into redundancy.

But looking back on the lockdown and how we coped, I think if we have to go into another lockdown, we'll manage. If we can keep from knocking heads on the covidiots who forced us into a new lockdown, that is.